Feelings: choosing to love God

On communion with God, getting distracted, and Brother Lawrence (again!)

The presence of God is not a feeling.

God’s presence may involve our feelings, but He is not defined or limited by them. Human emotions are fickle and not to be trusted—though they should be listened to, as valuable messengers that give us insights into our wellbeing (or lack thereof).

‘My son, trust not to your present feeling; it shall be quickly changed into another. He who is wise and well instructed in the Spirit stands above these changeful things, not heeding what he feels in himself or which way the wind of instability blows. He will be able to continue unshaken; the single eye of his intention being directed unceasingly towards Me.’ —Thomas à Kempis¹

The closeness of God is a reality.

Jesus came to declare that ‘the kingdom of God has come near’². God Almighty, majestic and powerful, is ‘our Father in heaven’³—our Father who is present in the very air we’re breathing in.⁴ Whether we acknowledge or are aware of His goodness, the reality of it doesn’t change.

If communion with God—practising the presence—isn’t a feeling, and can’t be defined by a sensation, then how do you know when you’re doing it? How do you identify what you cannot feel?

Love isn’t always a feeling, but it is always a choice.

The scriptures demonstrate story after story of God choosing to show abounding loyal love to His people. Each time God’s chosen people turn away from Him and go their own way, He draws them back again and doubles down on His covenant. His khesed is relentless: He demonstrates His love for us by continuing to choose to be in relationship with us humans, despite all the mess it causes Him.

The climax of the Bible is found in the Gospels when Christ, the Anointed One, the Chosen One comes to reunite all people to Himself. The entire story has been leading to Jesus and culminates in His life, death, and resurrection⁵—who makes Holy Spirit, who was once only available for a select few, accessible for all of us to continually dwell in the presence of God.

Communion with God isn’t a checkbox to tick off each day. It’s an increasing reality as we are transformed by the renewing of our minds⁶ and keep in step with the Spirit⁷.

We show love by our actions.

Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. —1 John 3v18

Every time my mind gets distracted (quite a lot!) and I turn back (repent) and choose God, I am demonstrating my love for Him. And every time I do that, I’m training my brain to be more constantly aware of Him.

It’s going to take a long time to become someone completely and always practising the presence of God—but every time that God in His grace helps me rewire my brain (Hebb’s law!), I take another step in that direction.

It’s said about Brother Lawrence that ‘his one method of going to God and abiding in His Presence was to do all for the love of Him.’⁸ This is a man who had one aim in life: to do everything—no matter how mundane—entirely out of love for God.

We search for [many] ways and methods of learning how to love God… and yet it is so simple. How very much shorter it is and easier to do our common business purely for the love of God, to set His consecrating mark on all we lay hands to, and thereby to foster the sense of His abiding Presence by communion of our heart with his! —Brother Lawrence⁹

Over the past week, God has intangibly helped me come closer to accepting that this all takes time.

At first, it is going to be really hard to keep refocusing so that our every action is ‘purely for the love of God’.

Initially, there’s going to be a lot of pushback from the noisy world we live in, old and ingrained habits, and in the spiritual realm around us.¹⁰

But the end is worth the wait! I desperately want to be the sort of person who—when ‘the true condition of the heart’¹¹ is exposed—radiates genuine peace and joy and love, overflowing to everyone around me. Oh, to live a rest-full life in this restless world!

So, keep going, my friend. May you be more aware of God’s closeness and overwhelming love for you, despite everything.

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Good Input™ for this week

📘 Celebration of Discipline, by Richard Foster. It’s always a good sign when your parents each have an overlap of the same book before they married—and that they keep both copies! This is a practical and helpful guide to practising spiritual formation. I read the chapters on Solitude and Service this week and found them extremely helpful.

🎧 Elijah and the Broom Bush | Silence and Solitude E2, from John Mark Comer. God has been drawing my attention to the importance of silence and solitude lately, and this teaching is a great overview of why and how to implement such a vital practice into your rhythms.

🦘 The Victorian countryside: I recently went away to Mansfield for three nights, on a trip all by myself, in order to REST and practice silence and solitude. It was marvellous. I did an immense amount of driving around the area and can confirm that we live in a stunningly beautiful country.

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Thanks for reading!

May God give you the strength to keep choosing Him, and may every act you do bring you into deeper love and communion with Jesus.

Love,
Bethany.

1. From Of the Imitation of Christ, in a chapter titled Inconsistency of Heart, and Final Intention. I merged a few parts to make it flow better.

2. Mark 1v15.

3. Matthew 6v9.

4. The Greek word commonly translated as ‘heaven’, οὐρανός, is a word that also broadly refers to the sky, the air, the atmosphere.

5. As they say at the BibleProject: We believe the Bible is a unified story that leads to Jesus.

6. Romans 12v2.

7. Galatians 5v25.

8. From The Character of Brother Lawrence.

9. Quoted in The Character of Brother Lawrence.

10. AKA the world, the flesh, and the devil.

11. As Richard Foster says, in Celebration of Discipline—a marvellous and extremely practical guide to spiritual formation.